Rant rant rant

Sorry to keep you oh so eagerly awaiting!

The interview was off to a hit start right away. Nixon, Hoover, and those crazy BeeGees dudes brought Hatcher over early in the morning. He was naked! Apparently, him and Anne were playing at the beast with two backs the night before. Lol, wonder how that went! (Badly, I bet!) Anyway, silly me mixed Hatcher up with the other poor saps I was hunting. I decided to make it up to him by letting him shoot this sicko guy who shot his buddy, Hitler, and Stalin. I think he actually enjoyed it! Creepy, right? Haha, I think I did right by making him a minion of mine. He pulls off the blue jumpsuit pretty well, too.

The interviews begins with the question, "Why you?" Damn, this guys has balls! Imagine asking the King of Hell, the very Prince of Darkness himself why he is in Hell!

So I say, "I've got father issues." Awesome answer, right? Then, I go on talking about families or some shit. The funniest part was when I convinced Hatcher to hug me! I wanted to laugh so hard, but this was gonna be broadcasted to all my babies in Hell.

But, Hatch wasn't satisfied. So, I'm, like, saying how everything always goes wrong for fathers and sons and stuff. Then, I get a little deeper in my rant. "I was his Lucifer. I was young and beautiful. He made his face to shine upon me. He made my face to shine. Yes. He made me the man I am today. He made it all, don't forget. I just do all his dirty work."

By that point, I had just about lost it. All the hate, regret, and sadness came to a head as I ranted to this guy. You know, he can do no wrong, right? My dad. He just does that shit he does and blames the bad stuff on me. People forget that he made evil. He was the one who made that bastard that blew up a building, or killed some person, or stole from someone else. But, they blame me and say I tempted them...or possessed them. Dude, screw that! I don't do any of it. I'm in Hell just the same as everyone else. I can't leave. I can't feel the feelings that they had from him. I know only regret and anger for I saw the face of my dad and sat at his right hand. Now, that place is filled by some MORTAL. Yeah, he's like magic or whatever. I don't care. I just know that any status I had up there is gone.

"When it comes down to it, he can do no wrong and I can never do anything right. Fucking shit happens in the world, but if he does it, fine. That's Dad's holy fucking will. If I do it, then it's 'I'm so disappointed in you.' Fuck that."

After that, I was sick of hearing myself bitch. I didn't want to think of Dad anymore. So I spun this story about burgers or whatever. Hatcher kept getting this weird look while I was talking. No clue what that was about though. It was like he wasn't listening, which annoyed me. So, I burned him with sparks from a torch, lol. But then, I got over it and had some fun. Got really dramatic in the end! Acting is fun! Maybe I'll go check on Mr. Shaking-the-Speare and see how the play is coming along.